The Orphanage Visit

Hubby Gene here once again. I'll talk a little about our orphanage visit on Friday, though I am sure Keri will post her perspective at some point. We drove from Guangzhou to Maoming starting early in the morning--departing at 6:30 a.m. It's about 5 hours to this neighboring city to the southwest. This is where Zoey was found and lived her life up until a few days ago.

Maoming is much smaller than Guangzhou. It's filled with tens of thousands of people on mopeds. I've never seen so many motor scooters. We got to the orphanage just before lunch time. The staff led us up to the fourth floor playroom, where we met many of the caregivers. We got pictures of several children whose Lifeline parents asked us in advance to contact. We gave out some care packages to these kids and talked with the orphanage director.

Then we met Zoey's foster mom. It was really a rather unemotional experience, which surprised us. Zoey cried when she and some other teachers left the room, which was one of the few times she has showed any kind of great emotion, so we took that as a good sign. We gave her foster mom a gift and soon left the room. Our travel group had gathered some money and given it to the orphanage and they showed us the large pile of diapers they were able to purchase with the money.

The orphanage was comparatively nice, based on others Keri and I have seen around the world. They kids had good food, a roof over their heads, indoor plumbing and obviously had some good education resources. They took us to Zoey's preschool classroom and we saw her little chair with her Chinese name printed on the back of it. Her former teachers played with her there a few minutes.

Finally, they took us around front to Zoey's "finding spot"--the place where she was abandoned. We posed for a picture there, but neither Keri nor I felt like smiling. Zoey is abandoned no more, so we felt that we kinda checked that off our bucket list and were soon ready to move on. The orphanage director treated us to a nice lunch, and then we started the long ride back to Guangzhou.

I should mention that about 2/3 of the way back the headlights went out on the bus, so the driver kept going, on the highway, in the pitch black dark, and we were all scared to death. Keri started singing "Jesus, Take the Wheel" to lighten the mood and after some prayer and nail biting we arrived safely back at the hotel. I was gonna do room service at that point, since we were so tired and it was around 8:00 p.m., but we found out a room service hamburger was $30, so I opted for McDonald's instead.

The orphanage visit did shed some light on Zoey on the behavioral side. Honestly, though, we will have to wait until we get home to get her on a regular schedule and begin addressing her needs in earnest. The visit was really just a puzzle piece for us, and hopefully God will show us how this fits in her personality and behavior as we get a few months down the road.

Zoey is really a sweetheart. We love her smile and her laugh. She readily reaches for Keri and has begun repeating English words when we read to her. When she goes bathroom she says "bye bye" to her poop as it goes down the toilet. Keri has pulled out some matching outfits, which Eden just loves, and we've gotten lots of great pictures.

Today (Saturday) is more paperwork and finalizing matters before Monday's U.S. Consulate appointment. Just a few days left now before we hit the airport for home. Keri and I are both ready to be back in the States. We continue to ask for your prayers for us for safe travel, for Zoey's bonding and for God to be honored through our actions and speech here on the other side of the world.

Oh the Drama!

Another fabulous day in China getting to know our new daughter, Eden! On tap today was a medical exam required by the government as we near the time of our Consulate appointment. Eden has gotten pretty happy-go-lucky in the last two days, but just like any child who goes to the doctor's office, she was none too happy when the actual poking and prodding arrived. The whole thing took like 30 minutes.

Thanks to Nana (grandma), Eden was also sporting a fashionable and inexpensive stroller today. Our specialists recommend holding Eden as much as possible to begin the process of getting good eye contact. Well, we've had that from Day One, and since Eden is having no problems connecting with us, we opted to give her a nice place to sit with wheels and give mommy and daddy's arms a much-needed break.

We did some shopping--actually a little too much time-wise. Right after lunch Eden had a complete meltdown. We're talking a raging, heart-pounding, screeching, wailing, gnashing of teeth, hold-nothing-back tantrum and grief session right in the middle of the street in downtown Guangzhou.

These times are really a tough balance for mom and dad, because the idea is to let her grieve even though some of this is not grief but just a 19-month old being a 19-month old. Also, we want Eden to find her comfort in Keri first to help establish the mother-daughter bond as quickly as possible. Eden's reaction during the tantrum was interesting--she held out her arms for me or Nana, but not for Keri. So, the fact that we would not let anyone but Keri comfort her made the tantrum last a lot longer. It breaks our hearts, but it's building hers.

The afternoon was bountiful with paperwork. Nobody will be able to say of our child that she is not well documented. If at age 25 she wants to apply to be a construction crane operator for Moru-speaking people in Sudan on nights and weekends, we've probably already filled out a form for that. This evening the whole lot of us (7 families in all) had dinner at a Thai restaurant nearby.

Probably the most fun of the evening was after dinner when we headed back to the hotel and took Eden to the playroom downstairs. She had fun playing with balls, getting tickled and running around in her squeaky-shoes. (The squeaky-shoes are like a staple in China--everybody has them and all the little kids go squeak-squeak-squeak when they walk. It's quite entertaining for them and for us.)

Finally, bath time--another meltdown, but not quite as bad as a few nights ago. I think Eden is getting her sea-legs under her and learning, slowly, to trust us. Honestly, we're pooped and she's pooped, and it's just about bedtime. Both Keri and I agree that overall today was not a great day for Eden, but they'll be good ones and better ones, and that's just fine by us.

Tomorrow is a shopping day. One of the other dads figured out today why we have to stay for 2 1/2 weeks in China--apparently we have to spend a minimum amount on souvenirs before they let us come home. If only we had known! Seriously, every establishment in every city in China ends with a gift shop at the exit. Walking out of the medical exam this morning I half expected to see a display of silks, jade jewelry and porcelain tea serving sets.

This morning we saw the White Swan Hotel in all it's glory. When you see the scale of foreign adoptions as we did today, the abandonment of children in this country really comes into focus as a critical problem. I'm praying opportunities will continue to open up for the Chinese as well as other nations to help stem the growing surge of orphan children. This is a worldwide issue, not just here in Asia.

It appeared today that this entire 28-story skyscraper was built with the singular focus of processing adoptive parents and their adorable Chinese children. They are EVERYWHERE. I kept asking people with children where they were from. Indiana. Idaho. Ohio. California. New York. Georgia. Alabama. Tennessee. Texas. Kansas. Washington. Nevada. Breakfast this morning looked like the Romper Room convention. The tables in the restaurant were already set up with high chairs. Party of three and baby? Right this way... There was a whole baby food section at the buffet.

Guangzhou, Keri said, is like the Las Vegas of China. There are lots of neon lights. There's even laser beams coming from the bridge over the river at night. It's definitely the nicest of the places we've been so far. The neighborhood around the hotel is very walkable and has lots of interesting shops and restaurants. The people are very friendly and open. And most of them will be happy to give you a "special discount" on jade jewelry. Tomorrow we also get to see some friends from the U.S. who are now living in China and we're really excited about that.

Four days to go until we're home!